My Daily Day

Wednesday, March 29, 2006

A CAT'S DIARY

Day 483 of my captivity...

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal.

The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction that I get from clawing their furniture.

Tomorrow I will eat another houseplant.

Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded -- must try this at the top of the stairs.

In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair. I must remember to try this on their bed.

I decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body in an attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear in their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was. Hmmm, that did not work according to plan...

There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary confinement throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the food. More importantly, I overheard that my confinement was due to my powers of inducing "allergies." I must learn what this is and how I may use it to my advantage.

I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit.

The bird, on the other hand, has got to be an informant and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured.

But I have patience...

I can wait...

It is only a matter of time....

2 Comments:

  • ooOOOooOOooo you're such a good writer!!! you should write for our magazine.. tee hee!!

    By Blogger VP, at 10:05 PM  

  • hauhauhauah vone I copy paste from an email !!!!! huahauahu sorryyyyyy

    I mean. *ehem ehem* *cough cough* OF COURSE I'M such a good writer.

    By Blogger Destri Andorf, at 10:08 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home